I saw the above sign on the subway the other day.


It said, "When that cold, fresh Budweiser pours out of a clean tap into a beer clean glass, it just might be the pinnacle of perfection."


First of all - GROSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This ad is only calling attention to the fact that 99.9% of Buds poured across bars in America is probably NOT poured out of a clean tap and into a clean beer glass! Ew.


Second of all - pinnacle of perfection? Come on, really? Bud: you're reaching.


Third of all - did they mean "…pours out of a clean tap into a CLEAN BEER glass" not a "BEER CLEAN glass"?


It didn't make sense that Bud would make a mistake with their bajillion Ad dollars, so I did some googling.

Definition of Beer Clean Glass from www.about.com: That glass may look clean, but invisible residue (like soap or grease) can cause beer's foam to dissipate quickly. A "beer-clean" glass is completely clear of residue.


Oh. It's still a confusing poster.

you go, girlfriend!

irenejkim77: so i just got a bday card for my mom.
irenejkim77: and i didn't look inside to see what it said. the front is a really beautiful peacock design.
irenejkim77: but inside, it says, "you go, girlfriend!"
irenejkim77: isn't that kinda...incongrous?

irenejkim77: i mean, can i really send this to my mom?

irenejkim77: um. hello??

can i ask you a question?

Am I a human dog whistle? Do I speak at a decible imperceptible to the human ear? When I talk, are dolphins crashing into the window of the room that I'm in?

The reason why I ask is because last night I went to a little Oscar get together. When the announcers for Best Supporting Actress came onstage, we started chattering about the alien looking, pale woman on stage. "Whoa, who is she? What's her name? When did she win? Why does she look like a tall glass of milk?"


I knew the answer, so I said, "That's Tilda Swinton. She won last year." Apparently, this is what I sounded like: " ____________" because people continued to look at each other with their hands in the air and the Dubya expression on their faces. I turned to Schuyler who hears every sniffle and sigh I make and asked, "Did I actually make noise just then?"

Anyway, when the announcers for Best Costume came onstage, I was not surprised that "The Dutchess " won. I mean, come on, it was the only period piece!

So, this is what i said:

Irene: Well, that's not very surprising...it was the only nominated period piece.

Then...


Jamie: Do you guys think it's that surprising that The Dutchess won? It IS the only period piece.

Then...


Chad: The only reason why that movie won is because it's the only period piece.


It's all so confusing. Until I wiki-ed the properties of human hearing. And what I found was very interesting. "Humans are equipped with very sensitive ears capable of detecting sound waves of extremely low intensity. The faintest sound which the typical human ear can detect has an intensity of 1*10-12 W/m2 (ok, whatever whatever). A sound with an intensity of 1*10-12 W/m2 corresponds to a sound which will displace particles of air by a mere one-billionth of a centimeter (emphasis added). The human ear can detect such a sound. WOW! (Surprisingly, I did not add this "WOW!". It was already there). The faintest sound which a human ear can detect is known as the threshold of hearing. The most intense sound which the ear can safely detect without suffering any physical damage is more than one billion times more intense than the threshold of hearing."

Then I found this chart. I guess sometimes I'm below the Threshold of Hearing. So ironic because I feel like my whole life people have been telling me to be more quiet.

yes, yes it's true

i wrote a blog detailing my recent stomach flu and my ()oop's resemblance to magic sand, the sand that repels water...but i took it down.

so, to all of you who wrote me, you weren't imagining things. it was up for a day and then i deleted it.

love,
irene

hmph

i'm so perturbed. faithful reader a. shau brought to my attention that in the trailer for "confessions of a shopaholic", the main character is seen breaking her credit card out of a block of ice.

THAT'S MY TRICK! (see may 5, 2007 blog "people who wear glasses just know")

hmph.