Sunday, September 9, 2007

anthurium

i walked by "ovando" today. it's a hoity toity flower shop near where i live in the west village. in the window was the most gratuitous and wasteful display of anthuriums. what, pray tell, are anthuriums? well, the ONLY reason why i know what anthuriums are is because of this story:

my summers at 381 wagon wheel way were fun. mostly because i got to spend the night with erin, my best friend, at least 3 times a week. we would push up two couches so they were facing each other and for reasons adults cannot understand, this was a comfortable and fun way to fall asleep.

i remember one time erin and i went into her garage after dark to see what the rabbits were up to. they were, for reasons CHILDREN cannot understand, kept in separate cages.

erin and i put heartcakes in cocoa's cage just to see if they would play. and play they did. as cocoa mounted heartcakes (or was it the other was around - i forget which was he and which was she) - we looked on in horror as heartcakes' eyes were filled with fear and rolled around like a loose marble in the cup holder of an All Terrain Vehicle.

when i reached into the cage to save heartcakes, i saw something that i will never forget. it looked like, yes, the stamen of an anthurium.

i tried to erase this memory from my head. but anthuriums are popular flowers. exotic and colorful, they were present in at least 5 of the 14 weddings i went to this year. which meant that i couldn't focus on the most important moment of my friends' lives. instead, i was thinking of rabbit penis. which i find highly disturbing.

i was going to post a picture of an anthurium and indeed, i found several pictures that would do the trick. but i couldn’t bring myself to do it. here’s a link if you really want to know: http://www.video-hawaii.com/dreams/free/anthurium.html

rabbit penis.

4 comments:

e. said...

i just read this entry to my mom, and we're both laughing so hard, we can't breathe.
i've read her several of your other entries, and she wants to know something: what, exactly, are you working through this summer, irene? : )

we LOVE YOU!

xox

irenie said...

wait - did you see the picture???

Sylvana said...

I saw the picture, and that is one of the most phallic flowers I've ever seen!

H said...

god those flowers are gross enough without the animal genitalia connection.
it is inconceivable to me that anyone would have them at their wedding. jeepers. i can assure you that if I ever get married my wedding with be a rabbit-penis-flower free event.
am I going to have to get married for you to come back to London? x